More retarded stuff...

Teacher: Who is absent today?
Class Chairman: Who is absent? Please raise your hand!
Obviously no one would raise their hand...
Like when no one was paying attention to the teacher and he goes...
Teacher: Who is not paying attention? Please raise your hand so that you can get punished!
Like the previous situation, no one raises his hand.
I thought of something else...
Late for school...
Teacher: Why are you late?
We usually give answers such as what we see in books and stuff. e.g.
"My alarm clock was busted..."
or...
"I was helping a blind man cross the road..."
or...
<etc.>
However, these answers aren't so good...
Like probably you get busted even more badly...
"Why didn't you have an extra alarm to be safe?"
or...
"Why did you help that man?" (OK... Exaggerating a bit... )
Due to these reasons, we need a foolproof answer that would get us out of these situations...
So the best answer is...
Er...
Let me think for a moment...
Um...
OK... I remember...
The best way to answer is...
"Because I am not early!"
And you won't get into much more trouble for that...
Because...
When the teacher asks...
"Why are you not early then?"
Then simply say...
"Because I am late!"
And so on and so for until the teacher gets annoyed... (shouldn't take too long)
Whatever that happens to you, is none of my business...
Use at your own risk!
But still... We won't be let of anyway, so might as well have some fun by pissing the teacher off...
BYE!